


Mass Displacement

by Lachdannen



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Self-Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-31
Updated: 2015-05-17
Packaged: 2018-02-15 15:04:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2233437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lachdannen/pseuds/Lachdannen





	1. Wake

I am not a morning person.

I don’t like to wake up, I like even less to get up, and I normally require a sacrifice of ham, eggs, and potatoes, with a cup of steaming coffee to pry me from my slumber.

Apparently, all of that becomes entirely unnecessary when I wake up inside something that the only word I think of to describe is “coffin.”

I blinked. _What the hell? I’m dreaming. Yup, I’m dreaming, I’m not awake, that doesn’t make sense. But when I’m dreaming and know it, I wake up. Um …._

Something on the other side of the coffin-thing’s semi-transparent surface moved. I couldn’t make out details though. Apparently I hadn’t bothered to bring my glasses to this dream. And being nearsighted, “blurry” became “indistinguishable” within a few feet. That was smart.

The interior felt cramped but I could still bring my hand up to press against the orange-tinted surface. To my surprise, heat met my hand, and it made me think of a piece of machinery that had just been turned off to cool. The whole capsule-thing shivered like someone had just flipped on a massage chair, and the air around me began to grow warmer.

A shriek echoed through the confines of my strange, tight prison. The first, a woman’s, grated on my ears in an agonized yowl that sent a shiver of cold settling in my stomach, a cold and tight block of condensed fear.  Her voice echoed hollowly through my amber-colored prison. Then another; a higher threadier scream. Next a man’s voice joined in, adding to the cacophony with a horrified baritone.   And just when I didn’t think I could be more frightened, the first voice stopped,  choked off in a sickening, wet sound.

_What the HELL kind of dream is this? Out. I have to get out. Out, out, out._

I started banging on the inside of the pod-thing’s glass and shouting, hammering my hand against it with a hollow thump. Someone must have heard me, or heard the others screams.   “Get them out, now!”

The voice sounded strange, coming through the coffin’s outside, and muffled by something else on top of that.  There was a flicker of movement as someone ran past, and then another. Blood pounded in my ears and my heart raced as a I clawed at the inside . I am not claustrophobic, but this was getting to be too much.

“Come on, somebody, let me—“

Even without my glasses and through the amber barrier, I could see the _thing_ on the other side as it moved and pressed against the side.   Its head tilted to one side, a single reptilian eye staring at me.  Boney armored plates ran across the top of its head, and it … smiled? Its mouth contained dozens of shark-like teeth which I found absolutely riveting. The way a deer tends to be frozen in place my headlights of the oncoming semi.  My fascination lasted right up to the point it grabbed the pod on either side and heaved.

Shark-man was apparently strong. Very, very, _very_ strong

I tried to brace myself in the small confines as a series of snaps and hissing noises echoed through my impromptu prison. The coffin shuddered, and I had a sickening moment of weightlessness as the coffin—with me inside it—was peeled away from the wall by the sheer monstrous strength of...whatever he was. Or she was. Or it.  

The pod came down with enough force that the only thing I could compare it to was a low speed car crash. Somewhere in between the sound of metal grinding on metal and the snapping sound my brain associated with that of cracked glass, I rebounded off the inside of the coffin’s interior like some kind of human-shaped bouncy ball.  Pain lanced through me in half a dozen places, and I dimly felt something warm trickle down the side of my face and into my ear.

There was a sharp crack, then the hiss of pressurized air escaping as the pod opened, the top falling to the side. I tried to focus, but in general I am not at my best when treated like something out of Looney Tunes.  I did manage to make out a woman’s voice, the words bearing an accent made me think of kangaroos and the Outback. “He’s alive, but he’s hurt. Grunt, get the next one. Go!”

I blinked as I looked up at her.  The woman who knelt over me was beautiful in a way that was hard to exactly describe. Waves of jet-black hair fell around her face in sheets, framing her strong featured face. Her eyes were dark and hard as they met mine in the instant before she wrapped her hand around my wrist and pulled me out of the coffin. My heart sped up, and a small part of my mind decided this was much more dreamlike. I could like this dream. A lot.

Though as she pulled, my legs didn’t support me. _What the hell? This is a dream, I can do whatever the hell I want, and I can’t stand?_

“Easy, hang on,”  the raven-haired goddess said as she lowered me to the ground. She was stronger than she looked, and didn’t waver at all as she set me back, and I’m not exactly made of feathers. “You’re alright, just stay here a second.”

“Staying. I can do staying,” I managed to mumble. As she turned away, I finally had a moment to try and make some sense of my surroundings. In both directions from where I sat,  I could make out the shape of more capsules like the the one I was in. I watched as Shark-man tore another pod from wall about ten feet away, and set it down without dropping it like had happened to me. Note to self: do make Shark-man angry. You wouldn’t like him when he’s angry.

The other direction was more of the same, though I could see the hall open into a much much larger cavern that looked to be completely lined with those pods . I shuddered as the scene registered on my mind. _People in all of those? That’s a stadium at least of people. More? I don’t …._

“... hey, come on, look at me. Eyes right here.”

My attention snaps back in front of me as as pair of almost fever-warm hands cup my jaw, turning me to face someone new.  Her red hair was a tangled and matted mess that fell just below her ears.  Her eyes were a bright green, but the effect was dimmed by the tired circles under them.

“Are you alright?” she asked in a tone that made me suddenly wonder if that was the first, or even second time she had tried to talk to me.

“Fine. You’re fine. I mean, I’m fine,” the words tumbled from me. I feel my face crease in a frown. Was I slurring my words?

The worry lines on her face deepened, and she looked around a moment before she brought her attention back to me, biting her lower lip as she continued. “Come on. We can’t stay here.”

I pushed off the wall as I tried to stand, shaking my head to clear the mental cobwebs. That was a mistake. Pain hit me like a charging Mongolian horde and proceeded to run rampant through my head. I sagged, nearly pulling her down with me.

“Doctor Chakwas! I need you!” Red shouted, her voice ringing. I shut my eyes, pain zipping through again, though to a much lesser degree. Instead of a horde, I had a raiding party. That was progress, I guess.

A moment later I felt someone else’s touch. How many people were going to manhandle me in this dream?

“What’s wrong with him?” demanded an older woman’s voice, the syllables clipped and proper sounding.

“I don’t know. He grabbed his head and nearly pulled us both down.”

Someone started touching my head, hands run over my scalp, gently searching for damage. Cool fingers found just the spot with a surety of a trained professional.

“He’s taken a good knock, and he’s probably got a concussion,” the older voice said as she withdrew her touch, . “He can walk, but he might be unsteady.  Can you do it, or should I find someone else to help him?”

“I can get him,” the redhaired girl answered as she slipped under one of my arms.  I tried to focus on her for a moment, needing a reference point. She was thin, but not emaciated. Stress and fear clouded bright green eyes, and tried to hide just how cute she actually was.

“Sudden movements, bad plan” I mumbled, as I tried to kick the mental cobwebs free, this time without sending me to the floor in a heap.

“Probably a good idea not to do that then,” Red agreed as she tugged me along.  I lost track of things for a moment, pieces of time blurring together like a night of partying, drinking, and other shenanigans. I didn’t snap back into focus until Red asked me a question.

“You aren’t one of the crew, I mean, I know everyone on the crew, so where are you from?”

I blinked, trying to put the question into focus and finally managed kick out answer from my mothball-ridden brain. “Chicago.”

“On Earth? How did you get here? I thought they only had hit colonies.”

I frowned. _Colonies? What was she, British from the 17th century?_

“No idea where here is,” I managed finally instead, suppressing my inner wise-ass. My words were still slightly slurred and it pissed me off. Anger, however, seemed to have no bearing on my tongue’s ability to enunciate. _Stupid body parts rebelling._

“Uh, I think near the Galactic Core, if what we were told before the ship was attacked is right.” Red answered, not looking at me. She just kept pulling me forward, in a awkward half walk/half stagger that just barely kept pace with the others in front of us.

_Galactic Core? Did I fall into a freaking Star Wars movie or something? Shark-face doesn’t look like a damn wookie._

“Right. Pulling my leg. Have to be pulling ….” I felt my throat tighten and my voice trail off as we passed a gap in the wall, showing thousands and _thousands_ more pods.

Not even thousands. Millions.

“My god ….”

Red looked over and shivered so violently that it ran through me as well and my arm over her shoulder gripped her tighter, both of us just needing the human contact to feel safe.  “Come on. We’re falling behind,” she managed, and together we hobbled after the other stragglers.

The hesitation saved our lives.

The pair in front of us, two men, screamed in horror as the floor suddenly opened just to one side, and long clawed hands reached out, slashing and grasping.  They went down screaming, vanishing from sight. Next to me, Red gasped inhorror, and I dimly noted that the next group after them fell under a similar attack.

I looked down at the metal grating we were standing on. The lightweight and very easily shifted metal grating. Sickly looking blue eyes flickered to life and blinked just below us with malevolent intent.


	2. Run

Fear can do lots of things. It can make someone freeze, make others flee mindlessly. It can be a motivator, or a hindrance. In those ten seconds, it was the driving force that kept both me, and Red, alive.

As the first of the taloned hands reached through the grating, I slammed my heel down with all the force I could muster. With an audible snap the hand jerked back, and something that sounded like a scream of pain came from below. From a zombie. A zombie with cybernetic eyes and muscles that looked like they had been replaced with synthetic equivalents, but still a zombie.

"I am not going to die in a damn zombie dream." I gasped and staggered into a lurching run, pulling Red with me. She gasped in surprise, but stayed with me and we barrelled past the grating. Behind us, I heard the grating fall away and 'things' surge up from the depths.

I used to run track, and cross country, and I considered myself in fair shape. However, there is a distinct difference between running, and running while concussed, because going in a straight line at full tilt turned out to be way harder than it should have been. Red's breath came in gasps as we ran. My own breathing tightened, and after only a few steps I realized that the fear that settled in my chest had begun to constrict in a familiar way

We shot into the next room even as howls out of nightmare began to sound behind us, screeches that sent my heart hammering in my chest in panic, . Her steps were longer, and more than once I found her pulling at me rather than the other way around as we ran for the next door. The exertion and rising fear made it harder and harder to breathe, but air wouldn't matter if the things behind us caught us. My imagination treated me to a horrific scene of being pulled apart in a haze of dismemberment and blood. Behind us I could hear the scrabbling charge of the freaky tech-zombies.

Don't judge me. What else would you call them? Rogue cybernetic life forms? No. Tech-Zombie. Much easier.

The next door led us to a curved tunnel that slopped up, and my breath came with sharps spikes of pain

We made it through the next pair of double doors at the top, and into the next hall as it leveled out. Behind us, I could hear our screaming pursuers, their cries announcing their continued presence in a way that sent my hindbrain gibbering in panic. I could feel my chest tightening more and more, the weight settling there, constricting and choking.

Training and conditioning can only do so much, when it comes to asthma. Eventually, the disease has its say. I can sprint, or I can run at a reasonable pace for miles. I can't do both simultaneously, and we had been running for a couple of minutes now. My batteries were going to go dead, and soon. Sweat trickled down my face from the exertion, and I looked over at Red. Our eyes met for a panicked half second.

And then I tripped.

The impact was jarring and painful, starting with my arm and elbow as I hit the rock of the floor, going up through my shoulder as the momentum carried me on in a tumble. I rolled, but then everything went white for a moment as the back of my head bounced, just once. I blinked the white away and tried to remember what on Earth I had been running from. What had been the hurry? Why not just lie here and let whatever just take me? That wouldn't hurt as much, right?

I dimly heard Red shouting something that didn't make sense, the words echoing but the meaning stolen.

The world came back into focus and I froze as I gazed up into the mismatched eyes of the damned grim reaper ... or at least, a man who could fill that role. His face was scarred and disfigured and battered, and he looked like he survived just so he could go one more round, get one more scar. Scarred armor covered him, and he had what looked like a pressure bandage wrapped around one thigh. And he held a rifle big enough to be a threat to small aircraft and armored vehicles.

Grim Reaper stepped past me, giving me a single glance that seemed to weigh my worth in a single moment and found me completely beneath his notice. He raised his weapon and took aim down the way we had just come, muttering under his breath the whole way, just low enough I couldn't hear. Red reached me, said something to Grim Reaper. He growled something back but the words just weren't clicking anymore.

Lips moved, but everything echoed, hollow, garbling the meaning . My brain rebooted slowly, and I remembered just what we had been running from.

Oh. Right. Zombies.

Red helped to haul me up, but the world spun again, and I had to lean on her heavily to keep from falling over. My chest hurt and the world had gone from the white agony of pain, to greying around the edges of my vision instead. Thunder sounded behind as Grim Reaper fired and we looked back a moment, and got a good look as the first zombies chest and head exploded, sending its arms bouncing in the corridor and the rest of the torso flopping back like a land bound fish.

Red paled, and I felt sick, and we turned and hurried along as fast as we could, but at this point it felt like my legs were made of lead and each step took a costly expenditure of willpower to keep going.

The tunnel ended in a door that didn't match the surroundings and as we passed through a second doorway, dozens of other voices assaulted us. The tightness in my chest made it hard to focus on anything but the stark difference from rough rock and strange metals to what reminded me of the inside of a submarine or naval ship, with glowing controls.

A short blonde woman bobbed into view, her hair pulled back in a ponytail, a long scrape along her jaw. "Kelly! Where have you…." She trailed off as she looked at me.

Red….no, Kelly, her name was Kelly, gasped. "Jenny, little help."

"Rolston, get over here!" The blonde shouted as she ducked under my other arm. "What's wrong with him….god, his lips are turning blue!"

Shadows continued to eat away at my vision till there was nothing left. It hurt to breathe, it hurt to move and it was getting just so hard to be scared of a dream. I just wanted to stop. As the two women lowered me onto something soft and warm, the only thing I could think was that I would finally stop running and rest.

And then someone jabbed me in the shoulder with a needle. I tried to flinch out of reflex, but it was just too much effort. But the pain didn't stop with the needle. Suddenly my entire arm, my neck and my chest burned just under the skin as whatever I had been injected with went to work.

I shrank in on myself, curling up and unable to stop from coughing as I gasped in huge lungsful of air. The burning sensation started to fade after a moment, the fire ants scurrying off to torture someone else.

I blinked several times as my vision started to slowly come back into focus. Kelly stood next to the bed on one side, while on the other side, a maternal woman stared at a display just above my head, her gray hair in disarray and tucked hastily back from her face.

"Heart rate is returning to normal, and his lungs seem to be clearing. I will need to run some tests later, but he should be fine for now," the other woman said, looking over at Kelly. "What happened?"

"I don't know. We were the last ones to get back. I didn't realize he was having problems until he tripped."

"Alright, well, he's stable for now. Keep an eye on him. I suspect he'll have some questions. Did any other colonists make it?"

Kelly's voice dropped to a whisper. "I don't think so. We were the last ones on board. "

The doctor didn't answer after that, just looked down at me then back at Kelly and turned away. I heard a clunk as she busied herself with something on a tray a few feet away. Kelly seemed to deflate a bit as she leaned against the wall, her eyes closing.

I pushed myself carefully up to a sitting position.

It hurt some more, but nothing like right after the injection. My lungs had skipped the normal post-asthma attack recovery time, and I could breath completely normally.

"So, your name is Kelly?" I finally ventured, turning to face her.

Her eyes snapped open, looked a little unfocused for a moment before settling on me. She paused like she needed to gather her thoughts before she finally answered and extended her hand towards me. "Yeoman Kelly Chambers. Its nice to meet you, Mister…"

I felt my face screw up in disgust at the title. "My name is Micah. Mr. Moore would be my father, not me."

A genuine smile cracked her professional exterior a moment. "Alright, it's nice to meet you, Micah. How are you feeling?"

I considered that a moment, letting my bruised excuse for grey matter take it's time cataloging the damage. "Headache, enough bruises for two people, and whatever I got injected with is still burning like hell, but I can breathe so there is that. " I shrugged, and the pain in my shoulder forced me to stop the motion halfway, "And I did something to my shoulder. You?"

"Glad to be alive. Tired, but besides that, I think I'm intact, at least on the outside."

I mentally filed her response away. She wasn't okay, but I didn't want to push. Instead I looked around. "Where are we?" I raised one hand to stop the obvious answer, "I mean, yes, we are in Medical, but where is Medical located?"

"The SSV Normandy, " she said, but didn't elaborate. "I'm not sure how they got it here, but we were on a mission to stop the Collectors. The ones that stuck us in those pods. The ship was attacked, and some of us..." She stopped, shaking her head. "They didn't get the commander, and he must have taken the ship back. I don't know much else."

"Well, does the commander have a name?"

That earned me a classic "are you stupid" look. Or maybe she was trying to decide just how many hits to my head I had taken. "Commander Shepard," she said carefully.

That meant nothing to me, but clearly it was supposed to. "Oh, okay."

Kelly stared me with an intensity that normally reserved for studying complex math or science problems. I looked away.

"So, what happened back there? When we got you down here, you had almost completely stopped breathing."

"I have asthma." I said. I started to shrug out of habit, but halted the motion before it became painful. . "Exercise induced, as well as a few other things. I haven't had a attack that bad in years though. "

That thought, now that I had spoken it aloud, nagged at me. This didn't feel like a dream. This felt way too real. I didn't have time to continue that line of thought though, as a tingling pressure of someone's attention on me drew my attention back to the doctor and Kelly. Kelly's eyes were asking questions that she didn't seem sure how to word. Chakwas, on the other hand, had turned around to face me, her arms crossed and her eyes narrowed.

"...what?" I looked between them, "I mean, what did I say?"

"There hasn't been a documented case of asthma in an adult in eighty years," Chakwas said flatly. "Even in the colonies."

"Um, what?" I asked, feeling stupid. "I mean, I don't need an inhaler now, whatever you injected me with worked wonders, but I have asthma. I've always had it."

"Dr. Chakwas, I think he's telling the truth. Or at least what he believes to be the truth," Kelly said carefully. Her tone annoyed me, and I opened my mouth to say something else, but the doctor cut me off.

"Tightness in your chest, lips turning blue, couldn't catch your breath, no matter how fast you were breathing," she rattled off.

I shut my mouth and nodded.

She scowled at at me. "There are several other conditions that mimic asthma symptoms. I gave you a targeted muscle relaxant and bronchodilator, which would relieve a great many of them. But you can not have asthma. It's impossible."

"I've had it since I was, like, four," I said, starting to feel my temper rising as I swung my legs off the side of the bed to face her. "I'm not lying, and the implications that I am are a bit insulting."

I started to say something else, but everything around us shook, and I had to catch myself by grabbing the bedframe and wall to keep from falling. Kelly snaked her arm around something that resembled a construction arm to keep standing, and Dr. Chakwas caught herself on the end of the other bed.

I looked at them both as my pulse jumped. "And that would be..."

A second thump rattled through the ship and this time I sprawled as my grip slipped. The other two didn't fare much better, or so I gathered from the sound coming from where Kelly had been standing. My head throbbed as I pulled myself back up. "Okay, really, what the hell was that?"

On the far side of the room, a panel on the desk lit up and a man's voice spilled out of it. "Doctor Chakwas, we have wounded from the ground team coming in."

Doctor Chakwas pulled herself back to her feet. "Thank you, Joker. How many? "

"Not sure. Thane sounded a bit distracted and I didn't want to play twenty questions when people were shooting at him."

"Alright, thank you." Doctor Chakwas picked up a small medical kit and handed it to Kelly. "Go meet them at the airlock, give this to Mordin if he's not injured himself. I'll stay here and get ready for anything more serious."

She turned to me. "You, just stay out of the way please. We'll talk about your medical history later."

I finished standing and glowered back at her. "Fine."

_I am arguing with a freaking figment of my imagination. This is a freaky real feeling dream, that's all. Just stop it, Micah._

I had started to study the medical equipment around me—deciding I had no idea what any of it was for— when the door to medical hissed open. I turned to look and met the gaze of another alien, the second since the start of this madness.

He was thin, but not weak, like he was made of whipcord and sinew. His green skin looked more like a snake's to me, rough and dry, and his eyes were very large dark things that tracked every movement. He moved with a dancer's grace, light on his feet.

"Doctor Chakwas, Kasumi needs immediate care," he said, his voice humming with a strange harmonic, like a buzzing sound with each word. And then I saw his burden.

She had been burned. Her arm and leg looked red and blistered, her clothing and armor in charred tatters on that side of her body. The wounds oozed and she let out a pathetic whimpering cry as the green skinned alien set her down on the first available bed.

I ducked past him and out of medical, stopping and sliding down the wall not far from the elevator, my breath coming sharp and fast and panicked.

_Horribly burned girl._  
_Freaking Aliens._  
_Tech Zombies.  
_ _No recorded cases of asthma._

_Where the hell am I?_


	3. Illusion

I stared out the window at the stars. No matter what angle I looked at them, they were still there.

Right. This wasn't going to cause me a severe case of psychosis or anything. I took a deep breath, trying to slow my frantically pounding heart, and closed my eyes, and started to force myself through the options.

Which really just condensed down to two things: either this was real, or I was insane.

I didn't feel insane. Then again, what does insanity feel like? There is the classic argument of if you think you are insane, you can't be, because you are still capable of rationalizing it. I couldn't prove that one way or another though.

I wasn't dreaming in the normal sense. This just didn't have the dream like qualities of sleep, and seemed to be going on for far too long to be a dream. It wasn't random enough to be a dream, everything was too consistent.

Which circled back to this all being real. Which was crazy. Really, really crazy.

But … when you eliminate all other possibilities, the only remaining option must be true, no matter how unlikely. Thank you, Holmes.

"It's a beautiful view."

I jerked as her voice ripped me out of my introspection, and my grip on the rail tightened out of sheer reflex before I forced myself to let go.

"Hey, Kelly."

The redhaired yeoman stepped in to view and leaned against the railing next to me, looking out at the stars. Dressed in a clean uniform, showered, and having slept, she looked almost unrecognizable as the woman who had practically carried me from the alien base, "I don't get a chance to just look at them very often. Always something that needs done, some paperwork that needs filed."

"Never enough time to do what you want and what you need to do, I suppose," even as the words left my mouth a twinge of guilt shot through me. I had a lot of things I had left undone for just that reason. "The trick, is figuring out where the balance is."

Kelly turned to head, looking at me in profile. "Fair enough. Speaking of needs though, how are you feeling?"

I shrugged. "Tired. Sore. But okay, I guess."

"No problems with the air?" she pressed, green eyes still on my face. "I mean, the whole breathing bit."

"It's mostly athletically induced. I'm allergic to a few other things too, but something tells me that it's going to be easy to avoid dust in space." I waved a hand at the window in helpless frustration. "Unless I'm insane, and this is a dream.."

"This isn't a hallucination," Kelly said with an emphatic shake of her head. "You aren't crazy."

"I think there are some people who would disagree with you on that specific point." I paused, realizing my error. More guilt shot through me in a little aching spike. "... were some people, I guess really. "

"Well, I will just have to learn for myself then," Kelly said as she pushed off the rail, "so come on. Let's see about finding something to eat, and make some introductions."

My feelings on the matter must have showed on my face, because Kelly took a look at me over one shoulder and tried to hide a laugh as she continued. "Okay, maybe not too many introductions."

The mess stood practically empty when we entered, with a couple of people sitting at one of the table talking quietly. Kelly waved but didn't stop to talk to them as we made our way to the other side of the small room, stopping next to what amounted for the ships kitchen. Kelly swept around to one side, and opened what I assumed was the fridge.

Though for all I knew it was some kind of strange replicator. Star Trek has them, why not here?

"Gardner normally leaves something for the early shifts to find in the morning, though with everything else he might ... nope, here we go," Kelly said, straightening from her search. She set a large sealed container down. "No idea what he made, I kind of didn't eat last night, but it normally isn't too bad."

I eyed it dubiously. It looked like a thick soup. The problem with soup though, is that anything can go in it. And I was in a strange new world. It was probably better to be safe than sorry with anything I'm planning on digesting. "So … uh, what is it?"

Kelly shrugged. "Food? It's Gardner's cooking, it could be pretty much anything. Shepard did spend some extra cash on fresh supplies, but I'm not sure what all they got." She paused, and looked at the sealed container and back at the fridge. "Though, before we eat, it's probably better that we check something."

Before I could voice my question, Kelly tapped a button on the almost-invisible bracelet she was wearing. Orange light sprang up around her hand and forearm and I jerked back out of sheer paranoid reflex. Kelly froze in mid-motion looking nearly as started as I felt.

"Uh, sorry," I muttered, feeling color rise in my cheeks. Jumping at the fancy technological gadgets. Go me.

"You've never seen a omnitool before," Kelly said, more a statement than a question, her lips hiding the beginnings of a smile.

I looked down at her wrist and held up both my hands as my answer.

"We will have to fix that. We use omnitools for almost everything really. I was checking to make sure that we weren't getting into something that was actually for Garrus or Tali. We can't eat the same foods."

"Why? I mean, food is food, right? We might not like the same things but ..." I let myself trail off as I actually thought about that. Lots of animals eat things that people can't. Why wouldn't the same apply to humans and aliens?

"Not if you're a dextro-amino based life form," Kelly said as she closed the door on fridge and turned back to me. "We, you and I, I mean, are levo-amino based lifeforms. Our bodies are composed slightly differently on a molecular level. I'm not precisely sure on the exact differences to be honest, since we all end up as people, but it means that neither of them can eat our rations. Tali can't have anything that isn't kept sterile anyway, but even if she could, she wouldn't be able to eat our food and get anything useful from the experience."

"... right. I should probably just toss out every preconceived notion I've come up with, shouldn't I?"

She just smiled. "Or just understand that you don't know everything and will need a little guidance is all." She flicked her wrist and sent a small sealed package to me from under the counter.

Without even thinking, my hand snapped out and intercepted it.

Her smile widened. "Dr. Chakwas was concerned that if you had been in stasis for a long time, that you might have some other problems. Muscle atrophy was one of her bigger concerns, but whatever they were feeding you on the Collector Base did the job."

"Yes, I was sure to eat all of those Collector Wheaties they gave me." I flipped the package over in my hand, not opening, before I Iooked up at her. "I'm different from the others they took. I mean, you all were looking for them. I have been missing for so long, no one even knew to look anymore. What did they want with me?"

Kelly's smile faded. "We … don't know. It's kind of a mystery, to be honest. The attacks on the colonies were hidden, but they were direct. They didn't hide they were coming, just overran everything with the swarms and picked everyone up after. We … don't know how they got you off Earth. Or even if that's what happened … no offense."

"What do you mean, if that's what happened? I was there, I know where I'm from."

"Unless they messed with your memory somehow," she pointed out, "until we can get back to Council space and— "

A synthetic voice cut her off before she could finish, even as console on the far side of the room sparked to life. I turned to look at it.

"Pardon my interruption, Ms. Chambers, but I believe I have found enough documentation to make a positive ID. Would you like to hear it now?"

"Go ahead, EDI," Kelly said as she walked around the counter and started towards the console. I tagged along after a moment, though the ice in my chest just seemed to get heavier as I did.

"Based on the readings taken by Dr. Chakwas, as well as the stated information from yourself and Mr. Moore's accounts, I think I have found a match. "

The screen flickered, then resolved into a file, a small picture of my face in the corner.

"Micah Moore, age 28, reported missing on August 14th, 2013. He was never found. His car and apartment were found undisturbed and locked. No signs of forced entry. According to the case files, the detectives were unable to locate any leads at all. "

My mouth went dry as a I watched flashes of pictures appear on the screen: my driver's license, terrible haircut and all. Images of the police reports. Flashes of my facebook profile.

"According to the documentation I can access and compare with the information provided, there is a 95% match. There are a few discrepancies from the Medical Scan from Dr. Chakwas, however those could be attributed to your prolonged cryostasis and exposure to Collector technologies."

"What kind of discrepancies?" I managed to croak out finally, unable to take my eyes off the screen.

"Unknown. A more detail medical examination would be required to isolate. However, it appears that you are capable of functioning at a much higher physical condition than the human norm. Based on the known documentation of extended cryosleep patients, your physical condition should be much more severely deteriorated."

I let that soak in a second. "So, short version is I shouldn't be up and walking around, but bedridden till I get my strength back, basically."

"That is correct."

"And ... since I'm not, that's weird."

"Yes."

I just couldn't stop myself as I snapped back, my annoyance sounding sharp to my ears. "I don't know what I'm even talking to exactly, and I am the weird one here?"

The voice in the computer sounded offended. "I am EDI, the Enhanced Defense Intelligence for the  _Normandy_. I run the Cyberware Warfare and Counter-Cyber Warfare Suits. Additionally, I am now directly connected to almost all shipboard systems, and am capable of operating almost completely autonomously."

I paused at that and looked at Kelly. "You let me back talk to the ship?"

She shrugged helplessly.

Another voice broke out over the computer, accompanied by a small video feed in one corner of the display, showing the speaker, a average-looking man with a ballcap and t-shirt, his beard trimmed and close shaven. "Don't worry too much. You should hear the grief I tend to give her. Kelly, the Commander wants to talk to you and Dr. Chakwas in Mordin's Lab."

Kelly leaned a little closer to the screen as she answered, "Thanks, Jeff, I'm on my way up." She flicked a button on the console and closed the comm connection, turning away. "No rest for the wicked, apparently."

"Isn't it 'No rest for the weary?'"

Her smile returned for a brief moment before she rounded the corner, leaving me in the mess. "Maybe, but wicked is more fun."

And that left me to my own devices. I stared at the console's little blinking orange lights.

"Right … sooooo ... now what?" The lights just kept blinking, as I thought of the information, my life, spread out in front of me. What had been my life. "Um… EDI?"

"Yes, Mr. Moore."

"Could you bring up the information you just had a minute ago? I … there's some stuff I need to see."

"Of course."

The screen sprang to life again, images flickering to cover the display area. I reached up and touched the hologram, a small tingling resistance pressing back against my finger as I did, and the screen focused on the article I had selected. I leaned in closer, squinting as I started to read. I needed to know what had happened. To my family, to my friends. Maybe, just maybe, I wasn't alone out here.


	4. Cold

"Do you need anything else, Mr. Moore?"

Bitter anger poured through me but I attempted to keep the frustration out of my voice. "No, that's all, thank you, EDI."

"Logging you out."

The screen went dark, leaving me with the ice in my chest and my own thoughts. The flash of anger faded to apathy as the ice in my chest went to work and smothered it.

"You look a bit like someone just kicked your puppy. You alright?"

Someday, I vowed, I would stop letting random people sneak up on me. It got a bit old.

_Old, from the guy who's apparently 198 or something. That's just rich._

The man behind me turned out to be my height with red hair a shade or two darker than Kelly's. What really grabbed my attention was his accent, a thick scottish brogue that made me immediately think of  _Braveheart_.

I finally shrugged. "I'm fine. Just having some issues adjusting."

He eyed me, clearly not buying it. "Well, if you're looking for something to do, I could use an extra pair of hands."

"I'm going to be pretty much useless," I warned him. I glanced down and then mentally slapped myself. His left arm was in a sling, and it was strapped to his torso. "... oh, you meant literally."

"Well, I'm still waitin for my extra pair of robotic arms to show up, so you'll have to do," he said, his voice carrying more than a little dry humor in it. "Come on. Won't take too long, unless you feel like sticking around for the company. I promise Gabby doesn't bite, much."

I followed him into the elevator and he punched the controls, sending it down before he offered his good hand. "The name's Kenneth, but call me Ken."

I took his hand and gave it a quick shake. "Micah. "

"You're one of the colonists, right? The one that came in with Chambers?"

I gave him a blank look for a second as I took my hand back. Who was Chambers? It took a bit before the grey matter kicked in and did its job. "Ah, yes and no. Kelly helped drag me in, but I'm not a colonist ... it's complicated."

"Complicated? Are we talking legal complicated or other complicated."

The door dinged and opened, and we stepped out into the hall. " Um, I well, I think I'm officially deceased, so probably both?"

"Ah, that'll do it. You'd think that proving you're alive would be easier than it is."

"I guess I'll find out."

We passed through the double doors and into Engineering, and I got my first look at the fiery heart of the  _Normandy_ , herpower core _._ It was massive, humming with energy that could be felt in the air. Energy that could apparently fly through space.

 _"_ Holy …."

Ken grinned at my reaction as I stepped around for a better view. "I take it you've never seen one up close before."

"Most definitely not."

The engineer laughed. "She's a beauty, there's no denying it."

I stared up at it, unable to tear my gaze away. It was awe-inspiring. An enormous sphere of pulsing blue energy, like something you see in a movie, but this was definitely not the big screen. I could reach out and touch this.

And then promptly vanish as I am reduced to ash, probably.

I peeled my gaze away and turned back to Ken. "You didn't ask me to come down to stare at your shiny magic sphere. What do you need me to do?"

Ken waved me over next to the console he was at. "Here. I need to get into the vent down here and check the power relay two sections over, but I can't get this open. And once I'm in there, I'll need you to pass me tools, and maybe run and get some things, depending on how bad it is. I'm not sure how much work it will be until I'm inside."

I eyed the vent. It looked like someone had run over it with a car, then jammed it back into the wall. "I might need a crowbar or something. That looks a bit mangled."

Ken just stared at me blankly. I stared back. "... Never mind."

The vent's cover proved to be well and truly stuck. After several seconds the corner finally popped free and then proceeded to drop me on my ass. I swore under my breath as I glared at the vent.

"What the hell happened to this thing?"

"According to Joker, one of Collectors noticed him in the vent and tried to get to him before him and EDI flushed them all into space. Kicked it up good, but couldn't get it open fast enough to get to him."

I eyed it suspiciously, mentally transposing myself in its place and how well I would stand up to getting kicked liked that. Not well. I braced myself and pulled at the grate again, and was pleased as it finally came free. "There you go. Now wh—" I stopped mid-sentence as I noticed that we were no longer alone. A absolutely furious woman glared at the back of Ken's head like she meant to drill through it with her eyes.

"Kenneth! What are you doing down here? I thought Dr. Chakwas said you were supposed to be resting."

We both jumped at the sharp tone of the woman's voice. Ken's face took on a chastised expression, and he turned around to face his accuser.

"Ah, Gabby, you know I can't just sit still! I need to be doing something!"

The shorter brown haired Gabby planted her hands on her hips and glared at him. "You are supposed to be resting. And you can't be planning on crawling around with your hand like that! Are you insane? And how did …." She paused mid-tirade as her gaze flicked to me.

"Um, hi?" I offered, keeping my tone mellow and not rising from where I sat next to the vent. "It's nice to meet you?"

Gabby jumped and seemed to mentally backpedal for a moment, clearly having missed my presence to her tirade, her face starting to heat up. "I'm … sorry. I didn't see you there."

"I'm sneaky like that," I offered. I looked between the two of them. "Um, should I be going now? I mean I don't want to be in the way."

The two engineers answered simultaneously, Kenneth's almost frantic "No" nearly overriding Gabby's "Yes, please."

"Right. I'll … go stand over there till you two decide what the plan is."

Before Ken could stop me, I ducked past him and through the first pair of doors out of engineering. I got a glimpse of his silent plea to stay before the door shut. I let myself slump against the wall as I heard Gabby's voice raise again, and my mind wandered unbidden back to what EDI had shown me.

_Mark Moore. Brother. Deceased January 3rd, 2014. Car Accident_

_April Moore. Sister in Law. Deceased June 2014. Home Invasion._

_James Moore. Father. Deceased March 2015. Work Accident_

_David Batt. 1st Cousin. Deceased December 2014. Work Accident._

The list went on my head, the images burned into my memory. Every member of my family was gone, and had left no descendants. I wasn't just dead. I had been erased. Anyone who might have recognized my name, any connection with the world I had known, was gone.

"Those two need to just fuck and get it over with."

"Jesus Christ!" I exclaimed. "Am I just asleep on my feet, or is everyone on this stupid ship a damn ninja."

I spun to face the new voice. Her lip had curled into an amused smile, but my attention ended up focused instead on the astounding number of tattoos that covered her arms, shoulders, down her torso in a colorful and myriad whirl. The tattoos covered her more fully than the clothes she wore, and she didn't seem to be bothered by the fact at all. On a normal day, I would have found it hard not to stare.

Right now, I was just too tired though. I looked away and back at the door, and the muffled conversation on the other side. "Take it they have history?"

"I'd say. He just needs to man up and say something to her. Or she does. I don't give a shit either way, as long as one of them makes a move soon, before I space them both for some peace and quiet." She leaned against the rail of the walkway and looked me up and down. "Who are you? You aren't anyone I've seen around here before."

I let out a humorless laugh as I thought of the list again. "I'm no one. Not anymore."

Her expression hardened and anything that might have been pity left her so fast it might as well have not been there. "Oh, fuck you. Everyone has some sad sap story."

"And I never said you should care, either." I snapped and started to walk past her, heading back toward the elevator.

She reached out and shoved me, hard enough to stop me cold. "I didn't say this conversation was over. Who are you?"

The cold seeped into me again and, even to me, my voice seemed flat and expressionless. I didn't meet her eyes, gazing over her shoulder at the door, into empty space. "My name is Micah, and I'm a dead man. "

That reaction seemed to take her aback and she dropped her hand, letting me pass her. I took two steps and touched the controls to open the door.

And nearly collided with Kelly.

"Oh! I was just coming to find you ..." Kelly trailed off, and looked between me and the tattooed woman. "Jack?"

"He's all yours, whoever the fuck he is. He's got more issues than me." Jack muttered as she started down the stairs to the level below, stomping as she went.

I slipped away from Kelly, leaving the hallway and trying to flee from the flood of cold anger that jolted into me. I heard Kelly say something to Jack, and the tattooed woman say something back, but the only thing that I really heard was the thumping in my own ears.

I was alone. My family was gone. My friends were gone. I was a ghost of a time that no one would even care to remember, let alone miss.

I could feel the asthma attack start and leaned against the railing, my knuckles tightening till they turned white as I forced myself to breath slowly, the exercise that had been drilled into me slowly taking the edge off before it could get worse. In and out. Breathe in the through the nose, and out through the mouth.

"Are you alright?" Kelly's hand on my arm was gentle and warm, a alien sensation compared to the numbness I felt.

"I'm fine."

"Not according to EDI … or Jack, for that matter."

"Something tells me that the Artificial Intelligence shouldn't be allowed to monitor my state of mind."

"Maybe not, but she can monitor your stress levels based on your heart rate. Your readings spiked so high a minute ago she notified Dr. Chakwas, me, and Commander Shepard."

I didn't bother responding to that. What could I say, the computer was wrong?

"Look, let's just, go sit somewhere. You can explain what happened, alright?"

Cold turned hot in my mind and I whipped around to face her.

"What happened? I'm on a ship in space. I was frozen for close to two-hundred years. Everyone I ever knew is dead. Everyone that ever knew about me, is dead. I'm a ghost, just waiting for something to kick me over to oblivion, or whatever the fuck is waiting for me. That's what happened."

A little part of my mind knew that it wasn't fair, even as I uttered the words, but the cold rage in me screamed for release, and I couldn't deny it. I was alone in a way I had never even considered before. I don't do well being alone.

Kelly's expression turned startled, her mouth dropping open and her eyes going a bit wide as she took a step back.

I stepped into the gap, my pulse hammering in my ears.

"Every member of my family is gone. Dead, every single one. Every person I was ever related to, died and not a single person is left that will even remember who I am, no, who I was. I have been erased!"

I stopped shouting, my anger spent in the brief loss of control, and looked around.

I had caused a scene.

Behind Kelly, the door had opened to Ken and Gabby, who stared in surprise from the other end of the hall. Jack had come back up the stairs enough to see what the commotion was about. To my left, a door had opened to reveal the scaley, wide eyed alien who I had seen in medical, watching with an unreadable expression. To my right, the grizzled and scarred soldier who had covered Kelly and my run to the ship had his thumb tucked into his belt next to the gun on his hip.

And they were all staring at me. Some with sympathy, some just evaluating, but the collective weight of their attention settled on me, watching. My anger flickered under their regard, and died, sending me falling back into the cold and despair.

I turned, shutting them all away as I reached the elevator and the door sealed me in. My hands shook as it carried me up, and I could just stare at them. This was the world I was stuck with. I had to accept it.

The question was, how?


	5. Chapter 5 - Apologies

If you think about it, space isn't so much cold as it is devoid of warmth, devoid of light. For every star in the universe, for every brilliant point of energy, there are leagues and swaths of pure darkness.

As I stood staring out of the lounge window, it wasn't the fiery beauty and grace of starlight I saw. I was gazing into the abyss, and I didn't see a reason why I shouldn't.

Not the healthiest mindset, that. I wasn't exactly sure how long I had been here, but it was better than trying to confront rest of what was going through my head. I shoved the little voice of guilt to away; I'd deal with it later.

Behind me, the door hissed open to admit someone, but I didn't make the effort to turn to look and see who it was. It wouldn't be anyone looking for me.

"For someone who apparently doesn't have anywhere to go, you sure know how to drive off the one person who really took an interest in your welfare."

The sharp snap of anger in her voice felt like a physical slap, and dragged my attention away from the window and the pull it exuded.

She was the woman who had been carried into Medical just after I had come onboard, burned and only half conscious. Her tattered armor had been replaced with a pair of black sweatpants and tanktop, which prominently displayed an arm still wrapped in bandages, tucked against her side by a sling. They wrapped her hand and continued up over her shoulder to her neck. Her near jet black hair fell over one shoulder in a loose ponytail and her dark, slightly canted eyes were hard as she stared at me. I started to say something unwise, but her hand shot up, palm out as she cut me off.

"You've got a lot of nerve." The chill in Kasumi's voice froze my feet to the floor. "Kelly is a sweetheart. I don't care how upset you are, she didn't deserve that kind of attitude from you. And she has been nothing but kind and helpful," she snapped, taking a step forward, "She spent so much of her time the last several weeks worrying about everyone else without a thought for herself. She spent all that time making sure that everyone else was okay, that we could all function together.

"Then Collectors attacked the  _Normandy_. She and almost everyone else were dragged off the ship and stuffed into those coffins. And do you know what those things were for? They were designed to melt you down." She stepped forward again and punctuated her words by jabbing me in the the chest with her uninjured hand, "and she had to sit there and wait knowing that this is what they planned to do to her. How well do you think she's been doing with that, hmm?"

I flinched at the verbal assault as much, or even more, than from getting jabbed in the chest.

"I didn't kno—"

"If you weren't so self-absorbed then maybe you would have, " she said, cutting me off and pointing toward the door. "Maybe you should go work on that. Now."

I seized the remains of my ego and fled. I hadn't known what those pods had been intended for. The very idea that they were designed as some kind of mass extermination—and I had escaped it by dumb luck—set goosebumps down my arms.

But the real boat anchor to my mood? Kasumi had been right. I hadn't thought about anyone but myself. And then, I had lashed out at the only person who had consistently been interested in my well being.

_I'm an asshole. God, damn it._

Guilt assailed the ice walls that had formed around my emotions, stormed the castle, and seized it for the good of the realm. pressed my back to the wall and slid down it, and let that little voice in back of my mind finally have it's say.

_You took it out on Kelly because you are hurting. That is no excuse for it, and you know it. You've done this before, and it's screwed up friendships before. You don't have the option to push people away right now, so damn well suck it up._

I turned and moved to the nearest unoccupied console, doing my best to avoid eye contact with two crew members I passed.

"EDI, could you please tell me where I could find Kelly Chambers?"

A ball of blue light flickered into existence in front of me as the ship A.I. answered, "Yeoman Chambers is currently conversing in the CIC with Mr. Moreau. Should I notify her you wish to speak with her?"

"I think a better word would be grovel, actually," I said, rubbing my face with one hand. The prickle of stubble rasped against my palm. "And … and no. Please don't."

"Logging you out."

The elevator took on the feeling of being locked in a metal cage as it rose to the  _Normandy_ 's command deck, and I did my best to not fidget as I waited for the doors to open. My nerves only got worse as the door opened to the CIC and nearly a dozen eyes sighted in on me with varying degrees of intensity, and none of them particularly friendly. My palms started to sweat and the urge to slam the "Close Door" button was nearly overwhelming.

"Good job breaking it," I muttered to myself as I stepped out of the elevator before I could change my mind. Conversations stopped entirely as I passed by, and only added to my already staggeringly frayed nerves as the heat from their gazes burned into my back.

As I entered the cockpit, the chair at the helm slowly rotated to face me. The pilot looked up at me from his seat, his fingers actually steepled and his face calm and blank as he spoke. "Please, commence your grovelling at any time. Don't wait on my account."

I felt cheeks and ears go scarlet with humiliation at his words. Not that I didn't deserve it, but this was already hard enough. I looked away from him, and to the reason I had come up here in the first place. Kelly leaned against one of the consoles, her own face an equally unreadable mask, her arms around her middle.

"Are you planning on shouting at me again?" Her voice sounded flat, expressionless. She didn't sound angry, just tired, and it stung me.

For a moment, I almost ran. I could feel the urge to bolt well up in me, the need to escape, the need to get away from the stress. It was an itch that I wanted so badly to scratch.

But that would be a temporary fix on the larger problem, and considering everything, I owed her better than that.

I looked away from her as I started to speak, "No, I'm not. You saved my life. And I was so centered on what was going on in my head, that I didn't consider what was going on around me. What was going on with you, and with everyone else on the  _Normandy_. And it took someone else calling me out for me to stop and think."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have shouted at you. You've been nothing but kind, and a better friend than I deserved, if I can call you that." I finally looked back up at her, daring to meet her gaze for a moment.

It felt like a very, very long moment to me. She turned to the pilot, still sitting in his James Bond villain pose, "What do you think, Jeff?"

He drummed his fingers together. "I've seen better groveling. But I suppose I've also seen worse, too."

The corner of her mouth twitched into the barest hint of a smile as Kelly pushed away from the chair. "I guess we'll let it pass this time, then. Come on. Let's see if we can find you something a bit nicer for the ceremony."

"I ... okay." I had no clue what ceremony she was referring to, but I wasn't going to argue as I felt the tension drain out of me slowly. A thought stopped me though, and I turned back to face the helm, and more specifically, the console.

"Um, EDI?"

"Yes, Mr. Moore?" A blue ball of light flashed into existence to my right.

"I thought you said you wouldn't tell them I was coming up."

The ball of light flickered a moment. "In fact, I followed your instructions precisely. I did not inform Yeoman Chambers. That did not preclude me from informing Jeff of your impending arrival and intended topic of discussion."

The damn AI sounded far too innocent.

A trickle of laughter escaped behind me, and I turned back to find Kelly with one hand over her mouth. Joker grinned like that cat who ate the canary, and patted the pilot's chair. "That's my girl."

* * *

I found myself hiding near the back of the crowd as the crew of the  _Normandy_  gathered to say goodbye to one of their own. As I looked at the faces gathering around me, the reactions I had been met with started to make sense. I was not on a ship with a crew and a captain.

I was a guest in these people's home, where the computer was a part of the crew, and the crew had bonded like a family. They might fight, argue, and disagree, but when the chips were down, and it really mattered, they were there.

It was a very lonely sensation. I might be on this ship, but I wasn't one of them. For a second, I desperately missed my friends, my family, the people who I had known and cared about. People that I only I remembered now

The majority of the people around me were human, and I drifted slowly towards a few of the faces I recognized, and examined the people around me.

They were an odd mix. Some young, some older, and from what I could tell, from all walks of life. The alien crew members accented this in their diversity. I finally got a chance to see them all in one place, and my curiosity wasn't disappointed. They were a varied lot of individuals, from the huge form of Shark-face to the slim short build of the of a woman in a purple cowl and space suit.

The room started to still as two individuals made their way to the front of the room. One I recognized as the first woman I had met up waking up, Miranda. She halted next to the small dais, while the man—wearing a formal military uniform complete with rank insignia and medals—continued up to the coffin. He put one hand on the lid and bowed his head a moment before he turned to face the rest of us.

It was the first time I got a good look at Commander John Shepard. I had heard his voice for a moment at the base, but the few glimpses of him that I had seen had been of an armored soldier, his face hidden behind the helm.

A network of nearly invisible, thin white scars ran along one side of his face, like he had been pressed into something hot at some point. His hair was cut military short, and his dark eyes looked tired and worn.

Looking at him, he reminded me of Atlas, with the world on his shoulders.

He straightened and let his hand drop away from the coffin, clasping his hands behind him. "Samara was a Justicar, a living embodiment of the implacable principles of her Code. She once told me that she knew what her fate was. She said that she would struggle and fight all her life. And that when she died, she knew it would not be in the comfort of a bed. She was at peace with that fact. When I came to each of you, I told you that this could very well be a one-way trip. That we were going to take on odds that were so far against us, it was probably ludicrous. And each of you still signed on, and stuck with it, despite the risks."

He swept his gaze first over the non-human members of his team, then to the rank and file members of the  _Normandy_. Next to me, Jenny Goldstein, the woman who had helped Kelly get me to Medical, came to attention. And she was far from alone.

"You signed on before we even know who or what we were fighting. You had no clue where this mission would take you. You took that step into the unknown, armed only with the knowledge that there were others in danger, and you could do something about it."

That was the point when it really hit me. John Shepard was a leader with a capital L. The kind of man who didn't just order his troops to attack, but charged right along beside them. I didn't know anything about him, but listening to him speak about a woman I didn't know at all sent chills down my spine. The sense of pride and of loss was nearly overwhelming. Kelly wiped one eye with her sleeve, and Ken put his good arm around Gabby's shoulders.

John looked back at the coffin, his words drawing everyone's gaze down to it. "Samara seemed distant to many, but in truth, you all touched her with your devotion to this mission. She believed in what we were doing, just like you did, and while she never could express it as openly, she felt a bond to us. And in the end, she gave her life for us. Samara embodied the best of us. And she will be missed."

His words echoed through the cargo hold as he turned to face the coffin, and judging by the look on everyone's faces, they'd be echoing in people's memories, too. He brought his arm up in a stiff formal salute, respect clear and tangible as he held it for several long moments. Commander Shepard finally let his hand drop, and everyone started to exit slowly. Murmurs drifted through the room as people made their way to the elevator, talking quietly and consoling each other over the loss of a friend. I stepped back, intending to get out of the way of the others exiting.

And promptly bumped into someone. Apparently I am just not allowed to be anything even remotely close to graceful.

"Sorry, I'm failing at everything lately," I manage to mumble out as I turned to figure out who I had stepped all over.

Goldstein rubbed at her tear-streaked face with both hands as she started to laugh softly. "You really seem to have a knack for stepping on people's toes around here, that's for sure."

"It's kind of like having a superpower."

"... that would be a really crappy superpower," she said, still laughing as she offered her hand. "And apology accepted. I'm Jenny. We've met, but things were a little stressful."

"And I was a bit out of it, but I remember." I said as I gave her hand a small shake, "I'm Micah. And you would be, I think, the fifth person on this ship who I've actually had a conversation with."

" _Normandy_  took a beating to get to the Collector base … we've been busy. And you haven't exactly gone looking to talk to people," she said as she shrugged. She rubbed at her eyes again, drying the last of her tears. "God, I said I wasn't going to cry."

"At a funeral, it's kind of expected, for the most part," I said as I looked back at the coffin, and the small cluster of people who had remained.

All the non-human members were still there, clustered around Kasumi, Jack, and Shepard; with the additions of the scarred-face soldier, a dark-skinned man that I hadn't seen before, and the woman who seemed to be the second-in-command.

Jenny followed my stare across the room. "Come on. Let's give them some space."

As we entered the elevator, a cold chill ran through my body, like someone had just walked across my grave. Just out of sheer paranoia, I looked around the room, hesitating in the door a second.

Kasumi and Shepard were staring at me as they spoke to each other. The cold presence of being watched didn't vanish till the doors closed. I shivered again.

"I think maybe you have some more apologies to make," Jenny said quietly as the box began to rise.

I looked at the door, and thought about the flat look I had just received, "I think you might be right."


End file.
